Presented by the infamous SillyRabbit!!

Starring the Heroes and Hunters Court.

Episode 1

     nce upon a time in a far away castle, there lived a young queen named PegasusX. She was a beautiful young thing, who enjoyed the love of the kingdom. One day against the best wishes of husband, King Sig, she left the palace grounds to explore the Dark Woods.

As she finally realized that she was lost, having not left the castle grounds in years (oppressive king) : ), she sat on a large stone and began to cry.

Little did she know the stone she sat on was actually a door leading to the cave of the EVIL lag witch, Lagdora. As she sat and wept, King Sig, felt a quiet discomfort. He assembled a search crew for his now missing Queen. Sir Lancerabbit having already felt the unease in the air, mounted his trusty steed marijuana and rode off ahead of the search party. Meanwhile, as Jester josh tries to assemble the search party to find the Kingdoms missing Queen, he suddenly realizes he has forgotten to get dressed before leaving, though with that body, being as funny as it was, most of the fellow searchers assumed he was just trying to make them laugh in times of turmoil.

I though about finishing the story, but the kids are about to be home, so maybe some other time we'll get part 2. Where Dark discovers King Sig is really his Father, and Busta finds out his mother is none other than the evil witch Lagdora.

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Episode 2

     he sun begins to set on what had been the beginnings of a beautiful day. But now King Sig sits upon his throne, obviously concerned, wondering where the Queen has run off to and why.

He begins to pace around the room, looking out the window, he sees the search party coming back into the gates. Jester Josh, still naked, is in the lead. All he wears is his jesters cap, and a frown. King Sig, seeing, this, Knows the news cant be good.

"Where is my Queen" he screams out the window, sending a flock of ravens flying into the air, and dozens of children scampering in every which a direction, looking for cover.

There is a quiet rapping on the kings door. "come in", bellows the King.

In the door walks four members of the kings closest council. The naked jester, Sir Busta, Sir Smakdown, and Sir Dark. They all walk in, shoulders slouched, with looks of sorrow spread across their face. "Jester, go put some clothes on, and don't come back until you do!!" snaps Sig. Sending the naked jester flapping and jiggling out of the room. For the first time in history, the jester doesn't look happy.

The king motions for the remaining people in the room to sit. "So what happened out there?" the king asks looking from person to person. Sir Dark is the first to speak, "We looked all over my liege, he says with a tone of fear in his voice, "We were actually on her trail for a little while, but we lost it in the LAG". "The Lag?" Sig asks violently, "Are you and your worthless men still afraid of the Lag forest?"

Sir Busta, with an air of confidence says "Your majesty I tried to convince the men to go, but they were all too afraid." Sir Dark chimes in " me too sir, Busta and I were ready but all the other men were a scarred."

Suddenly and violently Sir Smak jumps up from his chair, yanks his pants down and begins smacking himself HARD on the behind screaming "I'm sorry sir I've been a bad boy, a bad boy, I've been a bad boy!"

"Get a hold of yourself boy!" the king screams. Sir Smakdown stops and hangs his head to the floor, "Sorry your majesty" he says obviously in a sense of shame. "I just feel sooooo bad." "Sir Smak," says the King, " there's nothing more to be done tonight, go back to your home and rest, the search resumes in the morning, you two stay here" he says looking at Sir Dark and Busta.

As the door closes behind Smak, the king turns to the other two men still seated. "Now I wondered when this day would come" he said as his frow burrowed with concern, "but I guess the day has come to tell you." "Tell me what?" they both asked.

The king frowned, took a hit of his huka, and began to speak, "When I was just a teen boy, and Prince of this land, one night a holy man came to the gates, with five children. He said they were all the offspring of an unholy union between an evil KingPoopeater Lord of the Haywoods, and the sinister witch Lagdora. He instructed us that as long as the children were not re-united with their parents then they would never realize their true self. You Busta are one of their children. And you Dark, I tell you, because you are MY son, and the prophecies say you must be there to stop it from happening. I never told you, because you were the product of youth indiscretion with a prostitute."

Both men sit and stare wide eyed at all the information heaped upon them.

King Sig continues "Smakdown is also a part of the evil union, he got more of the poop genes, which explain his weird behavior, Making you Busta, his brother. I shall summon your other brother from where the holy man has had him stashed away these many years. His name is Hawqeye, you shall all meet in the morning, to form a NEW search party to find our queen, my wife.

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Episode 3

     s Sir Lancerabbit thundered his trusty mount, Maryjuanica, into the Lag Forrest, he noticed the sun was beginning to set. He paused for moment to consider his next option. Knowing that most of the Kingdom was afraid to venture into the Lag after sunset, he realized he was probably all alone in trying to find the Queen. At least for tonight. He pulled his canteen loose, took a long swig of water, and wiped his brow. Just as he was about to continue forward, he noticed an odd shaped creature flying through the air. It seemed to have the body of a human, but it had wings growing out of it's back.

Meanwhile back at the castle Sir Smak has just begun paddling himself red in King Sig's room.

Queen Peg sitting on a large rock, weeps as the sun is setting into the western sky. Looking around feeling lost, and alone, she notices what she assumes has to be a figment of her imagination. Not far away in the darkening sky she sees an almost human figure flying in the sky. She rubs her eyes and looks again. The figure appears to be getting closer.

Suddenly the ground begins to shake violently beneath her feet. She leaps from the stone looking around frantically. The very rock she was sitting on, begins to crumble, and up from the dust rises Lagdora, Queen of the Lag. As the dust settles Peg notices a tunnel under where she was just sitting. She looks at the evil witch and begins to scream in horror.

A short distance away as Lancerabbit watches the odd creature fling through the air, the ground begins to violently quake. His horse Mary, begins to step around uneasily. Suddenly a terrified scream fills the air. With one nudge to the flanks, Lancerabbit and Mary are sprinting headfirst deeper into the Lag.

Stopping screaming, only because she has to breathe, Peg sees the evil Queen grin at her.

" I knew the day would come when you would return" Lagdora said shrilly. "You have come home, you're father will be so happy!"

" What, what are you talking about?" Peg says with a tremble in her voice, "How could you know my father, he's been dead since I was but a child."

" Oh I'm sorry dear, you've been mislead" says Lagdora, " you're Father is very much alive and well." "He's....."

The thundering sound of hooves can be heard approaching. Queen Lagdora stops mid-sentence and looks around. Peg looks around hopeful of a rescue party from her kingdom suddenly sees Lancerabbit riding directly towards them. Behind him and above, is that odd flying creature she saw earlier.

As they break into the clearing Lancerabbit, hearing something strange glances over his shoulder, only to discover that creature that held his attention for so long, has somehow gotten behind him. For now though his attention must be on saving the Queen.

Peg and Lagdora watch as these two newcomers, break into the clearing. Peg hears Lagdora mumble something inaudibly, and with the wave of one hand, a large red translucent barrier surrounds the two of them.

Lancerabbit charges forward as a red barrier surrounds the two queens. Maryjuanica suddenly begins to try to reverse her direction, but it's too late.

Peg looks on as the horse digs it's feet into the ground, and the flying creature swerves to avoid this light, but it's too late, Lancerabbit, Maryjuanica and the flying creature are all engulfed in the red glow.

Suddenly the words "CONNECTION INTERRUPTED" begins to swirl around the three trapped individuals. The horses legs are still running, and the flying creatures wings are still flapping, but their efforts are futile. With a wave of the hand, the light surrounds Lancerabbit and the flying creature and they float, inside the glow, down through the tunnel.

"What have you done to them?" Peg screams at the witch. "They are fine my dear" Lagdora says as if speaking to a child "They're just contained, out of my way until I choose to deal with them."

Peg begins to speak, but the witch silences her. With another wave of the hand a large window appears before them. On the other side of the window sits KingPoopEater on his throne. A large brown throne with ornamental poops decorating it.

"Do You have them?" he asks impatiently.

" I have one of them" she replies " but the rest will be here soon, I can feel it.

"Feel it huh?" he asks grinning " you wanna feel it?" " Maybe work on child number six?"

She throws her hands up and says " Is that all you ever think about?"

"well," he says " I may like poop, and I may be fat, and I may be a quitter...... But I'm not gay"

"Listen!" she snaps "the two that were prophecised, they're here already. I'm a little concerned" " I have them under control for now, but I don't know how long I can hold them."

KingPoopEater picks up a bowl of poop and begins slinging it all over the room. "Just keep them till morning, and I shall send the OldGuard to deal with them"

The witch waves her hand again. The window disappears. She grabs Queen Peg's hand and they disappear down the tunnel with a scream. The once busted up rock where Peg sat crying just a little while before reforms, once again protecting the entrance to the witches lair.

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Episode 4

     s the sun rises on a new day, preparations are being made for the departure of the search party at Castle Sig.

Meanwhile, in Lagdoras lair, the evil queen sits at a sharpening stone, honing to a diamond edge, a long curved dagger. Along the handle of the dagger is a carving of a creature resembling the winged figure now being held in captivity. Queen Peg sits in a corner of the room looking longingly in the direction of her would-be rescuers. They are still trapped inside the pulsing red light but the barrier seems to have been slowly weakening overnight. Even Lagdora has begun to peek in their direction on a regular basis. Keeping a watchful eye to make sure her spell has not collapsed. She stands and begins to pace around the room, still sharpening the menacing looking blade. Lagdora and Queen Peg are both startled as a voice is heard from inside the barrier for the first time. "What's the matter Laggy baby, getting a little nervous? asks the winged creature. "I am the Dark Angel" the creature continues, " and it is prophesized that I shall be the one to lead you to your demise." Lagdora spins around quickly and with an evil glare begins to shriek, " YOU KNOW NOTHING YOU IMPUDENT (not impotent mind you.) FOOL! This dagger shall end that part of the prophecy," she says holding the dagger so the firelight glints of the sharpened edge, " and King PoopEater has dispatched The OldGuard to handle your little friend here" she says pointing at Sir Lancerabbit. "And I hear the OldGuard is made of countless numbers of trained killers trained by my love, King PoopEater himself." Plus" she adds " The rest of my children should be here soon, and when that happens King PoopEater and myself shall rule these lands with our children at our side." With that she bends slightly backwards and begins to cackle shrilly.

"But...but" Queen Peg stumbles, " my husband the king of these lands will never allow that to happen.
"Oh my poor dear child" the evil queen begins, "I hope you don't have all your faith in those worthless mortals you've been living with since you were born. Look at the rag tag band he's sending for you."
With that said the evil queen waves her hand and a viewing window opens on King Sig's courtyard. The formerly naked jester is now dressed in his normal attire. Sir Busta is getting his horse prepared as Sir Dark looks up into a menacing, cloudy sky. Sir Smak is already mounted on his horse, constantly stuffing feathers down the backside of his pants, wincing each time. There are several other people milling about ,getting supplies and preparing to depart.

" This is the group that shall rescue you?" Lagdora asks " Two of them, are my children, your siblings, and another I'm sure shall arrive there soon. I want them to find us. You also have two other siblings that should be finding their way here very soon. The rest of that so called rescue party shall meet their doom at the hands of Lagdora and The OldGuard, and if there's even the slightest hint of trouble, King PoopEater can be here in a matter of moments. He uses a special poop-chute to teleport between his castle and my home. Face it my dear, the world as you know it shall end soon. The day of Poop and Lag are definitely upon us!!!"

As the search party finishes getting their horses loaded and ready, there is a shout from the guard tower. "Stranger approaching...stranger approaching! "shouts down Guru.

Guru at one time was known as the most fiercest of fighters in the field, but somewhere along the way his defensive ability seemed to taper off, so he assumed the position of tower guard. Leaving his post high above the castle walls, he ambles down towards the entry gate.

"Who goes there? he asks of the stranger. "My name is Sir Hawqeye, I was summoned by the king for an important rescue mission, and when it comes to a hunt or a rescue, I always get my prey." "Well you seem mighty confident in your abilities," Guru said impatiently "but the king wants to see you first."

As Hawqeye headed for the Kings quarters, the rest of the rescue team finished up the last of the preparations and awaited the return of the latest addition to the search team.

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Episode 5

     brown circular cloud begins swirling in Lagdoras hideaway. The room begins to fill with a foul stench. Not that anyone would notice. The evil queen used her little remaining energy to force her three prisoners to sleep. Even now as the queen looks around, she sees the so-called Queen Peg, The Dark Angel, and Sir Lancerabbit sleeping, what would appear to an average person, a nice peaceful slumber. Lagdora, obviously happy, smiles wickedly as the smell begins to creep into every darkened corner of the room. As sudden as the smell appeared, it disappeared and before Lagdora stood King Poop-Eater, Lord of the Haywoods.

"Well it's about time you made it," she cackled, "I thought I was gonna have to handle this one alone."
"There's no way I was gonna miss this," Poop-eater replied " I was just waiting on the right time," he said while looking around the room at the newest sleeping additions. He walked gingerly over to the sleeping Peg, and began to stroke her hair gently. "this is what my daughter grew up to look like huh?" he asked with a sense of loss. "Such a beautiful young thing, looks nothing like her mother" he jibed.

"I'm gonna watch the "rescue party" fumble their way around the forest, care to join me?" she asked in an irritated voice, "or are you just gonna piddle with that hideous creature all day?" She waved her hand in front of her face, once again opening her watching window. King Poop-Eater sat down beside the sorceress, snapping his fingers, a bowl of popcorn appeared in his hand. He nudged the now entranced queen who was immersed in the action on the open window, she shrugged him off, and shushed him the way a mother would shush an impatient child.

On the other side of the "window", totally unaware they were being watched, King Sig's men were standing around in small groups, waiting for the return of Sir Hawqeye. He had been summoned to the Kings Chambers, and until he returned the search was on hold. Sir Busta almost ran to the newest addition to the castle as soon as he had arrived earlier. Busta had been unaware, until the night before, that he even had a brother, much less brothers AND sisters. Sir Smak had still not been told of his brotherly alliance with Hawqeye and Busta and would not know for some time to come. In the meantime he was preparing a horse for Hawqeye to ride. Sir Dark came up behind Busta clapping him on the back. "some news last night huh? he asked Busta. "Yeah, I'm still not sure it's all really sunk in yet. he replied " I'm not..." he trailed off as Hawqeye once again appeared at the bottom of the stairs. Hawqeye covered his eyes shielding the sun that shone through the clouds and looked around the courtyard at he hustling activity. He walked over and spoke briefly to Smak. Smak, obviously satisfied with what the man had to say, let go of the equipment he had been loading. Hawqeye finished up the work as Smak bounced his way over to Busta and Dark. Action suddenly came to an absolute stop as the King made his way out into the day. Everyone looked around at each other in amazement and a single clap quickly grew into a massive explosion of applause and cheers. The king smiled and waved to his men, and quickly ordered them to finish up preparations and to bring the Royal steed, as he was going to join the men on the search.

Final preparations were finished up and the king introduced three men to the group. Introducing them as hired trackers. Each man nodded at the group as his name was introduced. Sir Kano, a large bullish looking man, would be joining with Sir Aubie, a small man that looked as though he were built for tracking, and Sir Megahobbit, a small dwarf of a man brandishing an axe bigger than him. These three men, the King, Sirs Dark, Busta, Smak, Hawqeye, and Jester Josh all left the castle gates with a last wave to Guru, who was standing high above at his sentry post. He waved back, and smiled a little at the feathers dropping slowly from the makeshift cushion Sir Smak had prepared for his aching behind.

It was a long humid afternoon ride into the forest. The clouds of the early morn had drifted off to reveal a blazing hot sun. The group of men on horseback were obviously feeling the effects of being out in the sun all day. They had been following the path that several of these men had just traveled the day before. Stopping along the way only to ask for information from the people who lived within the King's realm. As late afternoon approached they came upon a spring and decided to take a break to rest the horses and to refill lost water supplies.

"Are we close yet?" the king asked in a weary voice. "Yes sir we're real close," replied Dark" "Just up around the next big curve is where we turned back yesterday" Smak said hanging his head in shame.

The men saddled up once again and rode off, approaching the lag forest. They reached the edge of the deep forest and could all see how the light seemed to almost not be able to penetrate the deep underbrush. "That's the weirdest thing I've evers seen" said Megahobbit "It's like even the light's scared" added Kano. Well, no guts, no glory....lets go!" exclaimed Hawqeye as he spurred his horse on. The other men did the same, and the group charged into the foreboding darkness.

As the men busted through to the other side of the underbrush, a world with which none of them had ever seen lay out before them. The forest seemed almost devoid of color. The grass, while tall and seemingly full of life, was black in color. The dirt on the trail they were following was now not so much a sandy brown, but a mysterious shade of red. The, trees while looming high above, seemed to all be gnarled and also black in color, all but one. There was one tree that stood apart from the rest. It was not as large as the others, but was a much more natural shade of brown. It stood along the pathway, and was only fifteen or twenty feet ahead of the group. The men rode slowly forward looking around at the darkened forest. Stealing curious, unknowing glances at each other.

"Have you ever seen anything l..l...like this?" Smak stuttered uneasily as they were passing the "healthy" tree. "Why yes, I see it every day" replied the tree in a jovial voice. Smak, scared out of his wits fell off his horse with a feather softened thud. The other men, equally scared, remained atop their mounts, but several were close to ending up on the ground as well, though they would deny it later."D..d.dddid you just say something?" Smak again stuttered in the direction of the tree. "I AM THE TREE OF KNOWLEDGE" the tree bellowed " I can answer your group but one question to help you along the way. But the answer will cost you a meeting with the Riddle Brothers.

The group of men huddled beneath the branches of the large tree and finally after several long minutes decided on their question. King Sig approached the Tree of Knowledge. "Where is my wife, Queen Peg? She has wandered off and I fear she is lost." The replying voice of the tree actually sounded sad, "Oh no my son, she is not lost she is found. She has been taken prisoner by the Queen of these lands Lagdora." The King quickly responded "Where is she, where is my wife?" he screamed in panic. "I'm sorry sir but I have answered your one question" the tree replied, "the Riddle Brothers shall meet you ahead in the fork in the road. They can help you along your journey if you can solve the riddle they propose." With that the tree grew silent and wouldn't respond even while the King yelled and screamed at the tree, it just stood there and swayed in the wind. After twenty minutes or so of this Sir Hawqeye finally approached the king, "Sir I think it's best we were on our way, we're obviously done here."

The king finally gave up his fight and once again mounted his horse. The men rode down the road, but not very far. About a hundred yards past where the Tree of Knowledge had given them the bad news. They came upon a fork in the road, in the middle of each path stood a small bald man. The one on the right spoke first in an almost gigglish voice, "We are the riddle Brothers, to continue down the correct path you must solve our riddle." "OK then, give us your riddle and make it quick," barked Josh "We're in a hurry here!" The second riddle brother, standing on the left path spoke almost in the same tone of voice as his giggling brother. "OK then, here is your riddle....

To find your precious Queen you must choose the correct path. We know which path you should choose, BUT one of us will always tell you the truth about which path is correct, and one of us will always lie to you about the correct path, your challenge, is to figure out the one question you could ask to be sure you go down the correct path.
Once you have figured it out, we will confirm your question with the correct answer and send you down the correct path. If you cannot solve the riddle we shall let you pass, but you may find your way, or if the wrong path is chosen you may never be heard from again.

From Queen Lagdoras underground lair, Lagdora laughed so hard she woke up the sleeping prisoners and King PoopEater laughed so hard he pooped himself, which of course made him happier than ever. "They'll never figure this out" cackled the evil queen. "they'll be lost for days," snorted the Lord of the Haywoods "we might as well turn this thing off for a while and relax.

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